Here are the top ten questions you shouldn’t be asking me, Kim Isaac Greenblatt, this time of the year. Remember, the April 15 2009 deadline is right around the corner. Please take it in the spirit of humor and it doesn’t apply to my clients:
10. Can I hold off and see you on the 15th? I have Easter/Passover/Pagan services to go to!
My answer is no, generally on the 15th I am swamped. If you want to try your luck, sure, but I can’t promise you that I or any other preparer I know will be available. We are booking up fast and the last minute choice times are booked already like Las Vegas vacation dates at Christmas and New Year’s time.
9. How come I am owing so much more than last year?
My answer is I can give you an overview and point out what has changed and what hasn’t. I can show you the specifics and refer you back to advice I gave you last year. If you took my advice and still owe, we can see what has changed differently and respond to it. If you didn’t heed my advice, there is nothing I can do and that is probably why you owe more than last year.
It may be the person who did your return last year (who wasn’t me) didn’t do a thorough job in planning with you. We can address that now for next year if you’d like but we may not be able to do anything about 2008.
If you can come in earlier in the season next year, we can take a financial pulse for next year and we can also plan now for any mitigating circumstances in your life or business.
8. Why did your prices jump so high? All I had differently were some stock transactions.
My answer is that they really didn’t, in your particular case, your return has gotten more complex because of all the stock transactions that you have that you didn’t have last year.
7. How come I owe money? I started my own business and I should be getting money back.
My answer is that you probably didn’t take into account both sides of social security and half of self-employment tax. You probably didn’t make any quarterly tax payments either.
6. How come you aren’t deducting (blah blah blah) that my previous accountant did? Don’t you know what you are doing?
My answer is that blah blah blah was an illegal deduction. He or she isn’t doing you a favor by doing something that is illegal. Yes, I know what I am doing, that is why I am not deducting blah blah blah so you won’t have problems if you are audited.
5. How come I can’t take my auto expenses and mileage? It isn’t fair.
My answer is that I can’t control an act of Congress. Tax law lets you take one or the other. Please write your congressional representative for more information.
4. Where is my tax stimulus for this year?
My answer is here. The stimulus deal for this year is explained there.
3. How come you aren’t doing my kid’s return for free?
My answer is that I would have until you showed me that your kid received 1000 stock trades, had rental income, three W-2s and is in a limited partnership with Donald Trump. My time is worth something and frankly, had you come forward with the information up front I wouldn’t be grousing about it and probably would have made the charge nominal.
2. How come you don’t have sympathy for me? I lost my job! Can’t you do my return for free?
My answer is that the Federal government and respective state governments have websites set up for that. Please go there, download and work the forms and you will be able to do the return for free. Having me help you makes me preparer of record and if you are putting me on the hook for being the tax preparer, you need to pay me for my time and services. I see that you use to be a CEO, did you work for free all those years?
and one of my favorite (or least favorite questions)-
1. Why should I pay you? All you are doing is data entry and I can do that at home.
My answer is you are wrong on both counts. First, I understand what I am keying into the software. I can do the same thing with pencil and the paper forms. Can you? Thought not. I am recertified each year in tax preparation in being current with tax laws. I also teach tax preparation and have written books on taxes and business. Have you done any or some of that? Didn’t think so.
Second, you couldn’t do it at home. If you could, you wouldn’t be here trying to demean me or yourself by asking such silly questions! Dude, it is the end of the tax season and we all are tired and want to be treated with respect.
Since none of my readers are abusive like that, we all can enjoy a good laugh at their expense!
April 12 2009
Interested in any of my books? You may want to make a stop over here. Please click through to purchase my books and some other interesting items that actually ARE on sale. Have you read my book, “Bad Tax Idea, Good Tax Idea“? Please order it today. The tips inside can save you hundreds if not thousands of dollars!
If you are looking for a day job, part time work, suggestions for saving money or investing, please check out my book listed below. Part of all the proceeds from the sales of that book go to Rett Syndrome research. One girl is born with Rett Syndrome worldwide every fifteen minutes. My daughter Arianna has Rett Syndrome and we are working to do all we can to make her life easier and find a cure in her lifetime. Boys born with the Rett gene generally die at birth.
Kim Isaac Greenblatt
Top Ten Tax Questions You Shouldn’t Be Asking Me
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